'In the event of a flight attendant freak out...'

By now we've all heard the tale of disgruntled JetBlue flight attendant Steven Slater. But no one tells the story quite as well as Stephen Colbert -- who has named Slater his Alpha Dog of the Week...

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Alpha Dog of the Week - Steven Slater
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes 2010 Election Fox News

Meanwhile, the Taiwan-based studio that brought us that CGI summary of the Leno-Conan late night debacle have recreated the flight attendant frenzy for those of us who weren't there to see it first hand...

Tasty art

I love stories about people with too much free time, which this appeared to be at first.

It turns out it’s actually about a high school art class in Utah where the teacher dreamed up an interesting idea to better connect with students.

The class spent about a week creating a 6,400-square-foot replica of Vincent van Gogh’s famous “Starry Night” out of Malt-O-Meal breakfast cereal.

After the project was finished, the cereal was scooped up of the gym floor and given to a famer to feed pigs.

What’s the craziest class project you ever took part in?

Goofy goggles

I'm sorry, but doesn't the protective eyewear Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad sported during an laser science exhibition in Iran last week look just like the safety goggles worn in the "TV room" in "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory?"

Champ sighting?

Those familiar with the Lake Champlain region have certainly heard of "Champ," the mysterious sea monster many believe lives in the lake. It's New York/Vermont's version of the Loch Ness Monster.

There have been hundreds of Champ sightings over the years, perhaps going all the way back to 1609 when French explorer Samuel de Champlain reportedly spotted a "strange monster" in the lake that would bear his name.

The best photograph of champ was snapped by a woman vacationing in the region in 1977. Experts said the photo appeared to be legitimate and it was later published in the New York Times and Time Magazine.

Now there is a new wrinkle to the champ mystery. Early Sunday morning Eric Olsen of Burlington says he was shooting video of the sunrise with his cell phone when he noticed something strange moving in the water. He posted the video on YouTube, where he was reluctant to claim it was Champ. Instead, he titled the video "Strange Sighting on Lake Champlain."

The Burlington Free Press talked to some cryptozoologists -- people who make a living studying mythical creatures -- who are very interested in studying the video.

However, the newspaper also heard from a biology professor at the University of Vermont who says it could be a young moose in the water.

After hearing that, I can sort of see how it could be a moose when I watch the video. What do you think? Check out the video (embedding has been disabled) and then come back here to share your thoughts.

It came from the break room

The headline on MSNBC.com says it all:
Yuck! 7 hospitalized after office fridge cleanup

I've seen some nasty stuff left in the office fridge or encrusted inside the microwave, but fortunately it's never been as bad as the rotting food that caused problems at an AT&T office in San Jose.

Authorities say an enterprising office worker had decided to clean it out, placing the food in a conference room while using two cleaning chemicals to scrub down the mess.

The mixture of old lunches and disinfectant caused 28 people to need treatment for vomiting and nausea.

Go take a look at your office fridge right now. What's the grossest thing in there?

Night of the Living Patrolmen

I had to pass this along after spotting it on All Over Albany. It's funny after reading this story.

All Creatures Great and Small

Nolan's teacher played this video for his class. It's a pretty good story...

Mmm...slightly vulgar Mexican food...

There’s a minor controversy in part of Troy where a restaurant is opening up called “Badass Burrito.” One mom who lives nearby is all up in arms, saying the name is horribly inappropriate.

I’m not sure how I feel about it. Part of me thinks the name is actually pretty clever (and I do love me my Mexican food). But at the same time, I don’t think I’d want my kids saying “badass.”

I guess I’d just tell the boys, “Don’t say that.” I’m pretty sure one would listen to me and the other still can’t read.

What do you think? Sound off on the badass debate in comments…

'No fate but what we make'

I've been enjoying "Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles" on Fox. The show is good, and apparently others have noticed -- because it seems like I keep catching reruns of "T2" and "T3" on cable.

Anyway, with that in mind, this Reuters headline caught my attention:

Killer robots pose latest militant threat: expert

Is this the beginning of the inevitable robot uprising?

Ad of the week

Placed by an Iowa mom unhappy with her son's behavior...

"OLDS 1999 Intrigue. Totally uncool parents who obviously don't love teenage son, selling his car. Only driven for three weeks before snoopy mom who needs to get a life found booze under front seat. $3,700/offer. Call meanest mom on the planet."

Dog's shot is worse than his bite

"Dog bites man" might not be news, but what about "dog shoots man?"

Honoring Ponch

Hey, I loved "CHiPs" and all when I was a kid, but come on. Is it just me or does it seem like standards are being lowered when Erik Estrada gets a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame?

And if we're giving Ponch a star, then where's the love for Larry Wilcox?

Eeewww!!!

Following my rant yesterday about distracted driver laws, comes this story...

A truck driver in Wisconsin flipped his truck over while fiddling with his MP3 player. Interstate 43 was closed for two hours while his cargo was cleaned up.

Oh, what was that cargo you ask? Forty tons of cow intestines! Yuck!

The driver suffered non-life threatening injuries and was ticketed for inattentive driving.

Huff & puff in the buff

Remember the "Seinfeld" episode that taught us the difference between "good naked" and "bad naked?"

The owners of a Dutch gym planning to introduce a "Naked Sundays" promotion may want to review that show. Yes, starting next month at Fitworld in the Netherlands you'll be able to get buff in the buff.

I can tell you right now, there are plenty of people I've seen at the gyms I've belonged to that I wouldn't want to see more of. And even the attractive people might not look so good while straining to lift weights (remember Jerry's girlfriend opening the peanut butter jar?).

Terror Level: Brite Blue

Was Turner Broadcasting’s guerilla marketing campaign for “Aqua Teen Hunger Force” ill conceived? Yes.

Was the terror scare that shut down part of Boston for hours a huge over reaction on the part of local, state and federal authorities? Absolutely.

I just can’t get past the point that these things were up for two weeks without anyone noticing or caring or that they didn’t raise any alarms in the other nine major cities where they were placed.

By the way, the best coverage of this oddball story has been on Lost Remote. They were the first to make the “Aqua Teen Hunger Force” connection and were the first place I saw with a link to the video of the two stoners that got arrested placing the signs around town. They’ve been all over this.

(Thanks, Pat, for the picture.)

Ouch!

Mozart, an iguana at a Belgium zoo, is not having a good day. He just found out that he's going to have to go under the knife.

You see, Mozart mated with a female iguana last week. Good for him. The problem? Seven days later his erection still hasn't gone away (you can't make this stuff up).

The vet has decided to amputate due to the risk of infection.

Don't feel too bad for Mozart. Male iguanas, it turns out, have two penises (way to go Mozart!).

If you google this story you'll find several articles about it. My favorite headline?

It's a hard decision for zoo vets

From the 'Duh' file

I read this last night. A new report says most Americans have had premarital sex. Did we really need a study to figure that out?

Not it!

I thought this was pretty outrageous when I first read about it earlier in the week. But at the time I thought it was limited to just one kooky school in Massachusetts.

Now it seems there are more schools banning "tag" and other playground games that include any sort of physical contact. Another school in the Bay State as well as schools in Wyoming and Washington are worried about lawsuits if a child is hurt in a contact game.

Never mind the jungle gyms, swing sets and slides.

If one of my kids was somehow hurt playing tag, suing the school would be the last thing I'd think of. When I was in the seventh grade I broke my arm playing football on a playground. No lawsuits were filed, nor were they even considered. Accidents happen.

Officials at one school say they've ordered kids to come up with other games to play.

"What we require is that children do not touch each other," said the principal at one of the schools.

Where do we draw the line? Is duck, duck, goose out? You know, someone could suffer a head injury!

'All rise...'

Many people in our neck of the woods are fascinated by the Porco murder trial that's going on right now. But I stumbled across this article about a trial in Oklahoma that could be a little more interesting...if not amusing.

If you want a friend in Washington...

Am I the only one who finds it ironic Ted Kennedy named his dog "Splash?"

Sen. Kennedy and his dog, Splash, visit Fenway

BOSTON (AP) - It was a dog day at Fenway Park as Senator Edward Kennedy and his Portuguese Water Dog, Splash, visited the old ballyard for a school reading event.

The senator read a portion of his new children's book, "My Senator and Me: A Dogs-Eye View of Washington D.C.," to a group of Boston-area school children.

The picture book takes readers through a day in the life of the senator, told from the perspective of Splash.

Joining Kennedy was Red Sox outfielder Gabe Kapler, who is recuperating from a torn Achilles tendon. Kapler swapped his baseball bat for a tennis racket and hit tennis balls toward the "Green Monster" for Splash to fetch.

(Copyright 2006 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)

I was going to make a crude joke about JFK having a cat named Marilyn, but this is a family blog (use your imagination)!