'Hey...it's Enrico Pallazzo!'

I’m watching one of the all-time funniest movies right now: “The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Quad.”

The movie came out in 1988 and was an instant favorite of mine and my friends in high school. I couldn’t tell you how many times we watched it in the theater and later on video -- usually in Noah Brownsey's basement.

Unfortunately, it’s edited on Comedy Central. We don’t get to hear the running water from the men’s room during the mayor’s news conference, the word “beaver” is muted when Frank Drebin admires Jane’s taxidermy and we don’t get to see Stephanie the driving student extend her middle finger.

But there is still more than enough to laugh at. I’m finding myself laughing out loud as I sit here watching it alone. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen this and I’ve forgotten just how hysterical it is.

The movie of course was made by the Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker team, the same folks who brought us “Airplane!” and was based on their short-lived and under appreciated TV series “Police Squad.” It is without question the definitive work in Leslie Nielsen’s long film career.

The movie chock full of too many great lines to list. Here’s just a few:

Frank: A good cop - needlessly cut down by some cowardly hoodlums.
Ed: No way for a man to die.
Frank: No... you're right, Ed. A parachute not opening... that's a way to die. Getting caught in the gears of a combine... having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go.

Frank: Wilma, I promise you; whatever scum did this, not one man on this force will rest one minute before until he's behind bars. Now, let's grab a bite to eat.

Frank: It's the same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girls dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day.
Jane Spencer: Goodyear?
Frank: No, the worst.

Mayor: Now Drebin, I don't want any trouble like you had on the South Side like last year, that's my policy.
Frank: Well, when I see five weirdos dressed in togas, stabbing a man in the middle of the park in front of a full view of 100 people, I shoot the bastards, that's my policy.
Mayor: That was a Shakesphere In The Park Production of Julius Caesar, you moron! You killed five actors! Good ones!

If you haven’t seen this classic in awhile, rent it or look for it on TV. You owe it to yourself!