Deal with Devil key to Sox success

Red Sox GM Theo Epstein discusses the trade of his soul for a World Series title.

BOSTON, Oct. 27 – Baseball’s “Boy Wonder” has made some important deals in his brief time with the Boston Red Sox, but this one will go down as one of the game’s biggest.

Sox General Manager Theo Epstein announced recently a one-year deal with Satan to ensure his club its first World Series victory in 86 years.

At age 30, Epstein is the youngest general manager in Major League Baseball. He signed the deal with the Prince of Darkness on Oct. 17, mere hours after the Sox crushing 19-8 defeat at the hands of their arch rivals, the New York Yankees.

The Sox have not lost a game since the deal was struck. That includes two brilliant starts from Boston starting pitcher Curt Schilling, despite a career-threatening injury that hampered him in Game 1 of the ALCS against New York.

“The deal benefited everyone,” Epstein said at a news conference. “It turns out God wears pinstripes and the Devil was anxious for a chance to stick it to the man upstairs.”

The exact terms of the deal have yet to be disclosed, but will most likely include Epstein’s eternal soul and the burning of Boston at the hands of a rabid Red Sox Nation following the team’s victory. It is also believed that the full lunar eclipse on the night the Red Sox broke the Curse of the Bambino is no coincidence.